Tuesday, March 23, 2010

Soul Sorting

If you want to know what my heart looks like today, you should just look at my house.

I am serious. I should go get my camera. Let me paint.

Nothing is over-the-top messy. But, oh the clutter. There are a couple of piles on the counter top - mail to go through. Little piles on the steps - clothes and shoes to be taken up to the boys room. A basket of laundry in my bedroom floor, folded, just not put away. Dirty laundry to be washed. Floors that need to be swept and mopped. All of my houseplants are sad and thirsty. Heaven forbid you open my kitchen junk drawer. If you walked in, you wouldn't be disgusted, but if you stayed long enough, you'd see that work needs to be done. The busyness of the past couple of days has not allowed for me to give my piles attention.

So is the case with my heart. Not a complete mess, just in need of attention.

I have heart piles. Piles that I need to address with the Lord. Parenting piles. Financial piles. Marriage piles. Friendship piles. Ministry piles. I think there is a Becky pile laying around here somewhere, too. So today will be brief, because I have some soul laundry to sort, but this verse struck me and I thought I'd share.

Do not let kindness and truth leave you; Bind them around your neck, write them on the tablet of your heart. Proverb 3:3

If I could crack my heart and look inside, what would my tablet read? The Word says to write Kindness (some versions say mercy) and Truth on my heart. What does that really mean , God? Let's investigate.

Mercy means - kindness or good will towards the miserable and the afflicted, joined with a desire to help them, to show one's self merciful.

Can I just confess that mercy has not been my strongest suit this past weekend? Luke has a double ear infection. I have been so frustrated by his inconsolabilty and lack of sleep that I have practically lost my mind at times. It has to be a work of the Holy Spirit in me to show mercy from 2:30 - 5:30am while we're up watching God Made Babies. Not my definition of a good time. Once again, the Lord gives me an opportunity to die to self and show good will toward my miserable and afflicted little man. To show myself merciful. Oh , forgive me Lord. I can be so self consumed.

Truth means simply divine instruction. God wants us to write His divine instruction on our hearts. Isn't that beautiful? Once again, I come back to my cyclical problem of busyness - neglect - empty - needy - Jesus - busyness - neglect - empty - needy - Jesus. And around and around we go. I don't just want His divine instruction written on my heart, I need it tattooed.

Heart. A word we use often - both literally and figuratively. In this passage it is used figuratively and this is the part that knocked my wind out. Stay with me. Heart is our inner man. Heart is made up of our - soul, mind, knowledge, thinking, reflecting, memory, inclination, resolution, determination, conscience, moral character. It is the seat of our appetites. The seat of our emotions and passions. The seat of our courage.

Proverbs 3:3 is telling us to write mercy, goodness, and God's divine instruction on our inner man. Write it on our soul and our minds. Reflect on God. Think on Him. Our resolutions, determinations, appetites, emotions and passions are to ALL point towards him.

So this morning, I am opening up and sorting through my junk drawer. I am in need of a declutter. I need to read through what I have been scribbling on the tablets of my soul, mind, thought life and reflections. My appetite is hungry for some divine instruction. The soil of my emotions need some Living Water. I resolve to sort through the clutter of my soul and resolve to not let kindness and truth leave me today.

Be blessed.

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