I rarely write in the evenings. But here lately, little Pookie (a.k.a. Luke age 2.9) has been quite contrary to the idea of bedtime. I wish I could say that I am firm and as soon as he comes down the steps I'm waiting on him with the spanking stick. I wish I could say he knows I mean business and he can not get out of his bed.
He is my third, and probably my last. And I am a sucker.
Tonight, however, I thought, "Tonight, things must change. No more cute Pookie coming down the steps for late night popcorn with mommy. No more puppy dog eyes staring at me over a bright orange paci."
(Yes, he still has a paci. Don't judge.)
Nope... tonight, I was going to (start) being consistent.
Eight o'clock rolled around and I curled up in bed with him, his little tan hand turning each page of a Thomas the Tank book. I read, he snuggled. At the book's end, I turned out the light. And instead of saying good night and closing his door...I stayed.
I stayed because something within me was highly aware of the time. Not bedtime...but the tic-toc of childhood.
Don't you wish we could slow it down?
My "littlest man" was born almost THREE years ago.
His birthday 8-8-08. A day set apart for great things.
Even China thought so.
I stayed a while in his double bed. Surrounded by build-a-bears and board books, petting his hair and singing lullaby's.
Praying and holding back tears.
He barely even smells like a baby anymore. He even smells three. (Silly. But mom you know what I mean.)
Would someone please tell me how to make this clock stop? Slow the hands of little-boyhood?
How do I punch pause on these sweet cheeks?
I am so thankful. Thankful to the Lord for this little guy. The missing piece to the Crenshaw clan. I am so thankful for his quiet feet slipping down the stairs for popcorn. I am so thankful for his tan hands and funny dance moves. I am so thankful for his devout passion for chicken nuggets and affection for Lightening McQueen.
I am so thankful he is mine. Even though not really.
He is the Lord's.
I am so thankful for God's good and perfect plan for His life. I am so honored to have his life touch mine.
Sweet boy. I am better because of you.
Now... let's go back to bed. Good night.